Contact: aeh5mg@virginia.edu
Ashley is the Project Lead and University of Virginia’s Education & Social Science Research Librarian. Ashley specializes in children’s literature and is currently researching the COVID-19 pandemic and social emotional learning represented in picture books.
Mary served as the project's Social Emotional Learning Cataloger and Digital Support. She graduated from UVA in May 2021. She is currently an MPH Candidate at the Yale School of Public Health, with a focus on Digital Health, Psychosocial Epidemiology & Public Health Modeling.
Grief and Loss
In the United States we've lost over 900,000 people to the COVID-19 pandemic (Stein, 2022). Collectively, as a society, we are facing an unprecedented level of grief and loss. These deaths impact our children. Close to 200,000 American children are now orphans who lost parents or primary caregivers to the pandemic. Out of that number, fifty percent of caregiver loss was among elementary and middle-school age children (Treglia et al., 2022). The books in this section aim to serve as resources for counselors, educators, caregivers, social workers, and librarians supporting these children. They are mapped to the CASEL Framework for applying evidence-based SEL strategies.
One Wave at a Time by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Management ; Grade Level: K-3
After his father dies, Kai experiences all kinds of emotions: sadness, anger, fear, guilt. Sometimes they crash and mix together. Other times, there are no emotions at all--just flatness. As Kai and his family adjust to life without Dad, the waves still roll in. But with the help of friends and one another, they learn to cope--and, eventually, heal. A lyrical story about grieving for anyone encountering loss.
The Rabbit Listened by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Management , Social Awareness ; Grade Level: PreK-3
When something sad happens, Taylor doesn't know where to turn. All the animals are sure they have the answer. The chicken wants to talk it out, but Taylor doesn't feel like chatting. The bear thinks Taylor should get angry, but that's not quite right either. One by one, the animals try to tell Taylor how to act, and one by one they fail to offer comfort. Then the rabbit arrives. All the rabbit does is listen . . . which is just what Taylor needs. With its spare, poignant text and irresistibly sweet illustration, The Rabbit Listened is about how to comfort and heal the people in your life, by taking the time to carefully, lovingly, gently listen.
Why Do I Feel So Sad? by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Management , Self-Awareness ; Grade Level: 1-3
Why Do I Feel So Sad? is an inclusive, age-appropriate, illustrated kid's book designed to help young children understand their own grief. Broad enough to encompass many forms of grief, this book reassures kids that they are not alone in their feelings and even suggests simple things they can do to feel better, like drawing, dancing, and talking to friends and family. Why Do I Feel So Sad? is: Practical and compassionate―Written for early childhood-aged kids, this book touches on common sources of grief―everything from death to divorce or changing schools. Different for everyone―This book normalizes the confusing thoughts and physical symptoms that come with grief, so kids know there's no one right way to feel or heal.
Why Do We Cry? by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Awareness ; Grade Level: PreK-2
In a soft voice, Mario asks, 'why do we cry?' His mum thinks for a moment, and then begins to tell him about the many reasons for our tears. We cry because our sadness is so huge it must escape from our bodies. Because we don't understand the world, and our tears go in search of an answer. Because we can't find the right words, and our tears speak a universal language. Most important, she tells him, we cry because we feel like crying. And, as she shows him then, sometimes we feel like crying for joy. To extend the concepts in the story, back matter describes the physical aspects and benefits of tears and provides two activities.
The Memory Box by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Management ; Grade Level: PreK-3
From the perspective of a young child, Joanna Rowland artfully describes what it is like to remember and grieve a loved one who has died. The child in the story creates a memory box to keep mementos and written memories of the loved one, to help in the grieving process. Heartfelt and comforting, The Memory Box will help children and adults talk about this very difficult topic together. The unique point of view allows the reader to imagine the loss of any they have loved - a friend, family member, or even a pet. A parent guide in the back includes information on helping children manage the complex and difficult emotions they feel when they lose someone they love, as well as suggestions on how to create their own memory box.
The Invisible String by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Relationship Skills , Self-Awareness ; Grade Level: PreK-3
In this relatable and reassuring contemporary classic, a mother tells her two children that they're all connected by an invisible string. "That's impossible!" the children insist, but still they want to know more: "What kind of string?" The answer is the simple truth that binds us all: An Invisible String made of love. Even though you can't see it with your eyes, you can feel it deep in your heart, and know that you are always connected to the ones you love.The Invisible String offers a very simple approach to overcoming loneliness, separation, or loss with an imaginative twist that children easily understand and embrace, and delivers a particularly compelling message in today's uncertain times.
The Heart and the Bottle by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Relationship Skills , Self-Awareness ; Grade Level: PreK-3
A poignant and beautiful story about finding joy after loss. There is a wonder and magic to childhood. We don't realize it at the time, of course . . . yet the adults in our lives do. They encourage us to see things in the stars, to find joy in colors and laughter as we play. But what happens when that special someone who encourages such wonder and magic is no longer around? We can hide, we can place our heart in a bottle and grow up . . . or we can find another special someone who understands the magic. And we can encourage them to see things in the stars, find joy among colors and laughter as they play.
Missing Mommy by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Awareness ; Grade Level: PreK-3
Some time ago, we said good-bye to Mommy. I am not sure where she has gone. Honest and straightforward, this touching story explores the many emotions a bereaved child may experience, from anger and guilt to sadness and bewilderment. Ultimately, Missing Mommy focuses on the positive--the recognition that the child is not alone but still part of a family that loves and supports him.
A Season for Mangoes by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Awareness , Social Awareness ; Grade Level: PreK-4
Sareen is attending her first sit-up, a Jamaican tradition that celebrates the life of a loved one who has died.The whole village has come to share memories of Sareen's Nana.Sareen wants to tell her stories of Nana's last mango season and their search for the perfect mango, but she's afraid the words won't come or that she'll begin to cry.It's only when Sareen faces her fear that she realizes it's not the sadness of Nana's death that she'll remember best but the joy of Nana's life.Set amid the rich culture and lush scenery of Jamaica, this moving book offers the hope of rediscovering joy after a loss and pays tribute to the remarkable power of story: to touch, to connect, and to heal.
Zayde Comes to Live by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Awareness , Social Awareness ; Grade Level: PreK-3
In this touching story, a young Jewish girl tries to make peace with the impending death of her grandfather. Rachel's grandfather, her zayde, has come to live with her family. This is because he is dying, she realizes. Rachel can't help wondering where he will go when he dies. She asks her friends. She asks her rabbi. She asks Zayde. No one has the perfect answer, but eventually Rachel finds a way to make peace with the fact of her grandfather's passing. She learns to gather all the moments she can, and to honor his life one small memory at a time. In this sensitive portrait of a young girl and her grandfather, author Sheri Sinykin approaches the issue of death from a distinctly Jewish perspective while demonstrating respect for all beliefs.
Stones for Grandpa by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Management , Social Awareness ; Grade Level: PreK-3
After a year of missing his grandfather and remembering things they did together, a young boy and his family unveil Grandpa's tombstone, place stones on it, and share stories, knowing the memories will never be lost.
Annie and the Old One by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Social Awareness , Responsible Decision-Making ; Grade Level: PreK-3
Annie is a young Navajo girl who refuses to believe that her grandmother, the Old One, will die. Sadly, Annie learns that she cannot change the course of life.
Grandpa's Stories by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Management , Relationship Skills ; Grade Level: PreK-3
One young girl reflects on a year with her beloved grandpa. She remembers the fields and parks they explored in the springtime and the old toys they fixed up in the summer. She remembers the handmade gifts they exchanged in the fall and the stories Grandpa told by the fire each winter. But this year, the girl must say good-bye to Grandpa. In the face of her grief, she is determined to find a way to honor him. She decides to record her Grandpa stories in the notebook he made for her and carry Grandpa with her as she grows. An honest and relatable depiction of loss, Grandpa's Stories celebrates life and the ways in which love lives on.
Always Remember by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Social Awareness , Relationship Skills ; Grade Level: PreK-2
After Old Turtle swims his last swim and breathes his last breath, and the waves gently take him away, his friends lovingly remember how he impacted each and every one of them. As the sea animals think back on how much better Old Turtle made their lives and their world, they realize that he is not truly gone, because his memory and legacy will last forever. Without mentioning a deity or religion, the text discusses how people remember those who have died and how their lives live on beyond them.
Boats for Papa by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Management ; Grade Level: PreK-2
Buckley and his Mama live in a cozy cabin by the ocean. He loves to carve boats out of the driftwood he finds on the beach nearby. He makes: big boats long boats short boats and tall boats, each one more beautiful than the last, and sends them out to sea. If they don't come back, he knows they've found their way to his papa, whom he misses very much. In this stunning debut, author/illustrator Jessixa Bagley explores the subtle and deep emotions associated with loss in a heartwarming tale that is sure to stay with the reader long after the book is closed.
Ida, Always by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Social Awareness , Relationship Skills ; Grade Level: PreK-3
A beautiful, honest portrait of loss and deep friendship told through the story of two iconic polar bears. Gus lives in a big park in the middle of an even bigger city, and he spends his days with Ida. Then one sad day, Gus learns that Ida is very sick, and she isn't going to get better. The friends help each other face the difficult news with whispers, sniffles, cuddles, and even laughs. Slowly Gus realizes that even after Ida is gone, she will still be with him--through the sounds of their city, and the memories that live in their favorite spots. Ida, Always is an exquisitely told story of two best friends and a gentle, moving, needed reminder that loved ones lost will stay in our hearts, always.
Where Do They Go? by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Awareness ; Grade Level: PreK-2
Julia Alvarez's new picture book is a beautifully crafted poem for children that gently addresses the emotional side of death. The book asks, "When somebody dies, where do they go? / Do they go where the wind goes when it blows? ... Do they wink back at me when I wish on a star? Do they whisper, 'You're perfect, just as you are'? ..." Illustrated by Vermont woodcut artist, Sabra Field, Where Do They Go? is a beautiful and comforting meditation on death, asking questions young readers might have about what happens to those they love after they die.
The Yellow Suitcase by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Management , Self-Awareness ; Grade Level: K-4
Asha travels with her parents from America to India to mourn her grandmothers passing. When they arrive at her grandmother's house, it's filled with strangers--and no Grandma. Ashas grief and anger are compounded by the empty yellow suitcase usually reserved for gifts to and from Grandma, but when she discovers a gift left behind just for her, Asha realizes that the memory of her grandmother will live on inside her, no matter where she lives.
Lost in the Clouds by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Management ; Grade Level: PreK-1
This beautifully illustrated book gently introduces children to the idea of grief and helps them to understand it. Billy misses his mummy very much. She lives in the clouds. Some days the sun is shining and Mummy's clouds are nowhere to be seen. Those are Billy's favourite days. He and Daddy would play in the garden all day long, and Billy knows that Mummy is letting the sun shine for them. But not all days are like that. Sometimes Mummy's clouds are dark, and Billy feels sad and alone. This moving and sensitively-written picture book gently explores grief and teaches children how to deal with their emotions surrounding the death of a loved one.
My Father's Arms Are a Boat by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Awareness ; Grade Level: PreK-2
It's quieter than it's ever been. Unable to sleep, a young boy climbs into his father's arms. Feeling the warmth and closeness of his father, he begins to ask questions about the birds, the foxes, and whether his mom will ever wake up. They go outside under the starry sky. Loss and love are as present as the white spruces, while the father's clear answers and assurances calm his worried son. Here we feel the cycles of life and life's continuity, even in the face of absence and loss, so strongly and clearly that we know at the end that everything will, somehow, be all right.
The Memory Tree by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Social Awareness , Relationship Skills ; Grade Level: PreK-1
Fox has lived a long and happy life in the forest. One day, he lies down in his favourite clearing, takes a deep breath and falls asleep for ever. Before long, Fox's friends begin to gather in the clearing. One by one, they tell stories of the special moments that they shared with Fox. And, as they share their memories, a tree blooms, big and strong, eventually watching over all the friends, just as Fox did when he was alive. This gentle and comforting tale celebrates life and the memories that are left behind when a loved one dies.
A Map into the World by Access at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Social Awareness , Relationship Skills ; Grade Level: PreK-3
A heartfelt story of a young girl seeking beauty and connection in a busy world. As the seasons change, so too does a young Hmong girl's world. She moves into a new home with her family and encounters both birth and death. As this curious girl explores life inside her house and beyond, she collects bits of the natural world. But who are her treasures for? A moving picture book debut from acclaimed Hmong American author Kao Kalia Yang.
Always and ForeverAccess at UVA OR search for a copy at your local library
CASEL Framework: Self-Management , Relationship Skills ; Grade Level: PreK-2
When Fox dies, the rest of his family are distraught. How will Mole, Otter and Hare go on without their beloved friend? But months later, Squirrel reminds them all of how funny Fox used to be, and they all realize that Fox is still there in their hearts and memories.
The Rough Patch by ON ORDER, COMING SOON
Evan and his dog do everything together, from eating ice cream to caring for their prize-winning garden, which grows big and beautiful. One day the unthinkable happens: Evan's dog dies. Heartbroken, Evan destroys the garden and everything in it. The ground becomes overgrown with prickly weeds and thorns, and Evan embraces the chaos. But beauty grows in the darkest of places, and when a twisting vine turns into an immense pumpkin, Evan is drawn out of his isolation and back to the county fair, where friendships--old and new--await. A deeply hopeful and positive book, The Rough Patch was awarded a Caldecott Honor and is a story about love, loss, and hope, and the healing power of friendship and nature.
When Sadness Is at Your Door by ON ORDER, COMING SOON
A comforting primer in emotional literacy and mindfulness that suggests we approach the feeling of sadness as if it is our guest. Sadness can be scary and confusing at any age! When we feel sad, especially for long periods of time, it can seem as if the sadness is a part of who we are--an overwhelming, invisible, and scary sensation. In When Sadness Is at Your Door, Eva Eland brilliantly approaches this feeling as if it is a visitor. She gives it a shape and a face, and encourages the reader to give it a name, all of which helps to demystify it and distinguish it from ourselves. She suggests activities to do with it, like sitting quietly, drawing, and going outside for a walk. The beauty of this approach is in the respect the book has for the feeling, and the absence of a narrative that encourages the reader to "get over" it or indicates that it's "bad," both of which are anxiety-producing notions.
Violet the Snowgirl by ON ORDER, COMING SOON
This versatile story gives children permission to grieve and helps them develop positive coping skills. When third grader Jerzie wakes up the day after her birthday, she feels grumpy. Her birthday cheer is gone, and she knows today is going to be nothing but boring--until she hears a knock at her door. Grandma's here! Grandma, Jerzie, and her little brother, Josiah, spend all day outside building and playing with Violet, a snowgirl that becomes a pilot, a teacher, a vet, and even their late granddad throughout the day. But when a warm day comes and Violet melts, Jerzie must learn to cope with her grief and develop positive coping skills. The stages of grief are complex, but using the simple analogy of building a snowman, Violet the Snowgirl is accessible and versatile. It helps children develop positive coping skills so they can process change, like moving to a new school. It also offers strategies for dealing with more difficult loss, like divorce or death. At the back of the book, you will find conversation prompts and resources to support children experiencing grief.
The Sad Dragon by ON ORDER, COMING SOON
Having a pet dragon is very fun! He can sit, roll over, and play... He can candle a birthday cake, lit a campfire, or so many other fun things that will make you laugh... But sometimes, not every story is a happy one... What if your dragon is suffering from a loss of a loved one? What if he's sad, angry, and heartbroken because his loved one passed away, and he cries and cries and cries? What should you do? You teach him about Grief and Loss. You explain death to him, and help him get through this difficult time!
